Texts from Last Night

[fairbrook]

You know the drill:
*Pick something from here, make up your own, or post a blank comment
*Others respond
*Hilarity, tragedy, sexy, whatever happens
*????
*PROFIT!

Comments

[crowsicle]

ok but
i warned you dog
nightmarefuel.jpg

[gordianknots]

i don't even have a means of reacting to this

[crowsicle]

imagine about two hundred and fifty of those
in varying sizes and colors
stuffed in your lunch box
ballooning out of the microwave
asses jutting out everywhere like flags at a car dealership
piles falling on you from the attic hatch because your sole adult guardian is some kind of sadistic machiavellian fuckpiece who thinks taping a ten year olds reaction is hilarious
and youve got a picture of what the first thirteen years of my life were like

[gordianknots]

I'm confused as to how a protection service for children was never called in at any point in your childhood.

[crowsicle]

im not sure they werent

[gordianknots]

I'm not even sure I comprehend WHY these puppets.

[crowsicle]

i could tell you but i think then you WOULD call cps

[gordianknots]

We don't have those there.

I'd call like, Saber.

[crowsicle]

same diff

[gordianknots]

Point.

[crowsicle]

man
i wonder if shed challenge him to a duel for me

[gordianknots]

She'd probably win, at least.

[crowsicle]

i dunno man
bro mark one is at least servant tier and sliced a falling meteor in half over our apartment
while bro pocketsize is semi immortal and can rip peoples souls from their bodies
itd at least be a fight worth taping

[gordianknots]

You'v never seen Excalibur.

Although you're right about taping.

[crowsicle]

what tech gods do i need to sacrifice a virgin to in order to get videography spontaneously invented in this place

[gordianknots]

I have no idea, unfortunately.

[crowsicle]

thats a shame since as far as i can tell theres no shortage of virgins around here

[gordianknots]

What if you make a mistake about that though?

[crowsicle]

then i go to court for slut shaming
and murder i guess

[gordianknots]

Sounds about right.