TFLN - RUBY CITY EDITION

[wavesofjade]

 the TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT meme

1. post with your character and their name/canon/pref in the subject.
2. either post with a TFLN or just wait for someone.
3. respond to people's texts or tag them with your own.
4. SHENANIGANS.
5. have fun!!

stolen from... everywhere.

Comments

[tonic]

1. And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
2. Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
3. I'm gonna fight the coyote
4. text her

1...

[thepuppetmaster]

Now I understand why it tastes like a Chiquito's dumpster in my mouth.

[tonic]

Why
Why would you do that?
I'm sure you got your daily dose of vitamin C but still

3

[bifroster]

As someone who has had to contend with coyotes before, I DO NOT RECOMMEND THIS.

[tonic]

It chased a cat up a tree!
What if it eats it when it inevitably comes down?
I can't live with that on my conscience!! I cry at ASPCA commercials, and those are perfectly living cats with sad music played over them!

3

[rollerbunny]

got ahead but im putting my money on the coyote

[tonic]

Thank you for your faith in me
But it's gotta go.
Do you think if I shake a can of coins at it it'll run away?

[rollerbunny]

a)
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.

b)
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.

c)
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff

d)
[Text them.]

the quest for sfw tfln posts is a difficult one

[watermelogisty]

a)
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.

b)
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING

c)
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!

d)
[Text him.]

b (who cares about being on time)

[arken7]

Wait, aren't you a lion?

Or was that your best buddy?

[heirdisqualification]

1. I just remembered yelling "they were going to let me become a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"

2. I didn't want to say that I missed him, so I just called him a piece of shit and hung up. It's probably a good thing that he can't get voicemails from me.

3. I created a new tequila drink: it's a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.

4. I've learned that I'm good at stealing things. Like live cats.

5. text him!

4

[bifroster]

Give Deneb back. Just because she adores anyone who gives her attention, does not mean she is yours.

3

[rollerbunny]

what are you naming it

[thepuppetmaster]

1. Lesson learned. Don’t roleplay with a real knife.

2. I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.

3. Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.

4. The back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." My palm read, "say yes to shots." When the fuck did I write that?

5. Text him!

4~

[bifroster]

Last night. In the kitchen. Somehow you found bourbon in the grocery store.

[thepuppetmaster]

Where else was I going to find bourbon, Jane.
Be serious.

2

[rollerbunny]

smooth
10/10

[thepuppetmaster]

Don't judge me.

3. [later than late]

[arken7]

Well, I remember needing to soak somebody with the empty ice bucket because of something like that. Might've been you.

[bifroster]

1. Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed.

2. I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.

3. Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.

4. Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.

5. Text her!

3

[thepuppetmaster]

I'm twenty-one and I think I've been through enough shit by now to earn the right to shake my cane at the whippersnappers running on my lawn.

[bifroster]

Then the words you are looking for is "ignorant idiots".

4

[rollerbunny]

mines good enough thank you

[bifroster]

but you can't pretend you're an astronaut in that!

2 (timeliness? what is that?)

[arken7]

Might as well regret nothing. Regretting everything is a bit of a waste, since you'll end up regretting how much time you spent regretting things that didn't need regretting and then you get into an endless cycle of regretting things.

My head hurts looking at that again.